While not food-savy enough to comment on menus, I still like to consider myself a restaurant critic. Instead of commenting on the latest tasting menu or new addition of Kobe beef (I am ADDICTED to Kobe beef) though, I keep my critiques much more superficial: the bathrooms.
No matter the décor or wonderful plates that land on my table, any meal spent at a restaurant can be ruined if my trip to the lady’s room isn’t satisfactory.
A dirty toilet? I’m never coming back. Toilet paper on the floor? Last time I checked I don’t eat at dive bars. No paper towels so I am forced to wipe my hands on my designer frock or waste 10 minutes under a dryer? My food is getting cold.
But, if a restaurant shows me a nice, spacious, decorated bathroom with well-lit mirrors, linen napkins to dry my hands, and maybe even a couch to wait for my girls on then it is automatically vaulted to my “must-return” list, even if the food is sub-par.
It may sound naïve, but when I’m out at night I need a place where I feel comfortable freshening up before going outside and facing the barrage of men (and women) who only critique my every feature. Standing crammed next to five other women under fluorescent lights that only accentuate the flaws never gives me the self-esteem boost I need.
What do you think? Does anyone else have any weird or unorthodox deal breakers when it comes to venue choice?
Also, be sure to look for my review of the Melting Pot this weekend. I am double-dating there tomorrow night and am very excited. Hopefully the bathrooms are spotless!
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